Are you smirting with me???

Webisode 5,Season 1

Smirting is the practice of smoking and flirting outside public places such as pubs, bars, cafés, restaurants, and office buildings where smoking is prohibited.

Forget about speed dating, blind dates and the web? Smirting is the new way to bag a partner. This combination of smoking and flirting has taken countries with a fag ban by storm. Let’s face it, the concept of heading outside for a ciggie isn’t much fun. But with fellow puffers standing around, and three or four minutes of awkward silence to fill, smirting is the answer to an exiled smoker’s prayers. Always have a lighter; a decent lighter is an essential piece of kit for any self-respecting smirter. After all, there’s a pretty good chance you’ll be approached by somebody looking for one. You can also pretend to need a light when required. It could be the spark of a beautiful relationship.Practice inhaling. Make sure you inhale with a touch of class. Think Marlene Dietrich and James Dean. Your chances of hooking up with someone will be smoking.

Wait for rain. Smirting gets a lot easier if there’s rain to contend with. It forces smokers closer together under canopies and umbrellas, making flirtatious small-talk more likely. Lads should also have their own brollies available. Rescue a girl from a hair-frizzing downpour and she’ll love you forever. Don’t cough. Nothing kills conversation like a phlegmatic smoker’s cough. The successful smirter suppresses the tickle in their throat until potential dates are at a safe distance. Have a drink on hand to calm the need to cough. Use one-liners. Standing around with a bunch of strangers can be a toe-curling experience. Nothing gets a conversation going like a cheesy smirting one-liner.

Be generous. Nobody likes a tightwad. If you’re happily smirting with someone and their fag runs out, quickly offer them another. It could buy you extra time together. If you’ve met outside a bar or café, casually suggest a drink back inside. Remember to blow smoke away from people’s faces, position your cigarette so it isn’t wafting in someone’s direction and stub out those butts properly. Mints at the ready. Smirt correctly and after finishing your fag you could be lucky enough to get a kiss. Make sure the moment isn’t ruined by the lingering taste of a cigarette. After quickly munching a breath mint, you’ll be ready to seal the deal.

Attributed to the best smirter A.E.G.

The Sun, November 19.2009.

The maven, the connector & the salesman

Webisode 4,Season 1

Ideas and products and messages and behaviors spread like viruses do. But who are the agents of this change? There are three categories of people that are responsible for such a diffusion of epidemics. Mavens, connectors and salesmen.

Mavens are "information specialists", or "people we rely upon to connect us with new information." They accumulate knowledge, especially about the marketplace, and know how to share it with others. They are "almost pathologically helpful". In this vein, "A Maven is someone who wants to solve other people's problems, generally by solving his own". Mavens start "word-of-mouth epidemics" due to their knowledge, social skills, and ability to communicate."Mavens are really information brokers, sharing and trading what they know".

Connectors are the people who "link us up with the world ... people with a special gift for bringing the world together." They are "a handful of people with a truly extraordinary knack for making friends and acquaintances". These individuals are characterized by their social networks of over one hundred people. Moreover they are people who understand the concept of the weak tie. The social success of Connectors is attributed to "their ability to span many different worlds as a function of something intrinsic to their personality, some combination of curiosity, self-confidence, sociability, and energy."

Salesmen are "persuaders", charismatic people with powerful negotiation skills. They tend to have an indefinable trait that goes beyond what they say, which makes others want to agree with them.

All three types of people above, are connected with "The success of any kind of social epidemic, which is heavily dependent on the involvement of people with these particular and rare set of social gifts."

References: Malcolm Gladwel's "The tipping point"